oh taco bell. you’ve been going through a lot lately. you’ve fallen on dark times. but you know what? i’m still there for you, baby. i’ll never leave your side.

…never.

i was totally STOKED OUT OF MY FEEBLE MIND when i heard that they were releasing the brand new quadrilateral steakums burrito! steak, in a tortilla. TIMES FOUR. or something. actually, ‘quad steak’ is a very strange name. what does it mean? WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING AT, SEÑOR BELL?

hey, doesn’t that guy look familiar? who is that guy? what’s your story, guy? WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING AT, GUY??

okay, that doesn’t have anything to do with that guy. he’s chris wylde, but all his youtube videos are boring, so i posted a clip from wrath of khan instead. much more interesting. uh… let’s get back on track here.

THE MYSTERY: “quad steak”. THE SOLUTION: “Four times the steak as compared to Steak Burrito Supreme®.” mystery solved. also, taco bell tempts you with the promise of a brand new recipe for steak. they task you. they task you, and you shall have it!

quad steak burrito

…well that doesn’t look that impressive. it’s a regular size burrito, maybe a bit bigger than the average bean burrito, but not as large as their grilled stuft variety. its insides are really bare bone, with a bit of rice and cheese, and sour cream and fire roasted salsa holding it all together. and then there’s the steak. the new, tender, moist steak. i have not been a big fan of their normal steak, as used in their steak burritos and other steaky products, so i was looking for something drastically different. which i found here. the meat is cut into larger chunks than the old steak, with a tenderness almost more like a roast a grilled steak. it is not at all chewy or gummy, as i found their old steak to be. and it is richly spiced, so that when eaten by itself, there is a clear peppery bite. i was really impressed.

as for the burrito as a whole, i liked it. as i said, it was pretty much just steak, but the cheese was nice, and the fire roasted salsa was a perfect match for the steak. the sour cream was hardly there in my burrito, possibly having merged with the salsa to become the one condiment to rule them all, which worked in my favor, because i don’t really like sour cream. the rice did not really factor in at all for me (it usually doesn’t at taco bell). all in all, a decent burrito! i would get it again…

IF IT WEREN’T FOR THE FIVE DOLLAR PRICE TAG.

yeah. way too much. it was filling, but it was hardly five dollars worth of food. this is the kind of item i’d expect to see on the “more than 99¢ but less than 3 bucks” value menu that… well that doesn’t quite exist. but still, it’s a very cut and dry burrito, and it’s just not worth five dollars. which sucks, too, because the steak is great. i would like to see them just replace all their old steak with it, but i somehow doubt that will happen.

so if you’re a die-hard taco bell fan like me, which you shouldn’t be, grab one before they’re gone. you’ll enjoy it. otherwise, you don’t need to waste your money. stick to real food.