in spite of anything you might know about me gleaned from these reviews, my one and only dream in life is to become SUPER BUFF. i want to get ripped. there’s nothing more impressive than a burly meat-sack full of rippling muscles. i know it, you know it, macho man randy savage knows it: [youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Igui65gY5M”] this message has been pounded into me by every cool dude i interacted with in.. Read More
Bahama Breeze’s Legendary Island Cocktails
Setting: The “Internet” – a futuristic wonderland of glowing circuits and pure information flowing, through a series of tubes, from computer to computer. Thousands of people are all around, transporting themselves on computer keyboards functioning much like flying surfboards, wearing backwards baseball caps. Love flows freely. BAHAMA BREEZE, a giant beast of man with a tiny palm tree apparently growing from his head, approaches FOOD MONSTER, a slovenly, unbathed man… Read More
Philly Phlava
THE OTHER DAY, i was in the mood for something disgusting. you know how, every now and then, the mood will strike you to just devastate yourself, to abuse your body and show it who’s boss? that was what this was. to shake off all instinct for self preservation and do myself palpable harm, to rebel against this prison that is my body; to strike a victory for the.. Read More
Seasons 52 Summer Menu 2012
the seasons are changing! all 52 of them. they have now changed over to “summer mode”, also known as “nightmare mode” in florida. out with the free love and other hippie ideals of spring, and in with the scorching heat and stifling humidity of summer. not to mention, delicious summer foods! yes, summer is filled with distinct flavors. much as the pumpkin serves fall as its special bitch-fruit, summer has.. Read More
Saladworks
i am healthy. let’s just face it – i’m a healthy guy! i eat well, as evidenced by my instagram feed. i meditate/sleep in upwards of 7 hours per day. i drink plenty of water in the form of dr. pepper. i have multiple semi-healthy stools every day. and i play ddr to keep in shape. it is not an exaggeration for me to say that i am the paragon.. Read More