Tampa Bay Food Monster

...eating food since 1985.

Arby’s Grand Turkey Club

TYPICALLY, change is a good thing. like, changing a poopy diaper, for example. where once there was poopy, now there is none. and this works! because there was a problem before. but then there are times when changes are made to things that don’t necessarily need change. this may be one of those times. …prepare yourself. this is where we’ve come. this is the brave, new world you were looking.. Read More

Firehouse Subs

DID YOU KNOW?? the submarine sandwich, originally known as the “filled zeppelin roll”, traces its origins back to the widely publicized and oft-lampooned hindenburg disaster. on the day of the disaster, the dining staff had run out of bread for sandwiches, and instead substituted long dinner rolls. after the hindenburg was destroyed, a plucky team of firefighters were called to the scene, and, once the fires were put out, the.. Read More

Taco Bell’s Cantina Bell Burrito

OHHH TACO BELL YOU’VE DONE IT AGAIN! bouncing straight off the wild popularity of your wildly mediocre doritos locos tacos, you’ve done a complete 180 and gone for the jugular of gourmet food. it works perfectly, because whenever i think “taco bell”, i immediately think “gourmet violent explosive diarrhea”. let’s see if they can expand that special flavor of gourmet directly into their food! this is the cantina bell menu… Read More

USF Taco Bus

the taco bus thinks he’s so cool, doesn’t he? well, he’s not. he is a SELL OUT! i mean come on, a little taste of national recognition, and it all goes to his head. now, there are FOUR LOCATIONS, the most recent of which cannibalized its own sister store, taqueria monterrey. now everybody can enjoy delicious tacos, prepared the same way in four different places across tampa. and what does.. Read More

Savvy Jack’s

savvy jack… now that’s a good name. obviously it refers to someone in the know, probably a pretty cool guy. and there’s something vaguely familiar about it. but apparently this particular jack is of the omelette-savvy variety (the best variety??). savvy jack lives in beautiful, sunny temple terrace, in that same plaza with the hookah place. i’ve seen it many times, but for some reason never really noticed it. that.. Read More