now daddy this is a very sensitive subject… [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRuHk6Drj2U] i recommend playing that through your entire reading of this review. it will allow you a higher appreciation of the products listed below, as well as life itself. i was given a cordial invitation to sample various goods released by dr. dunkin’ d. donuts himself, william d. “dunkin’ d. donuts” smith. in fact, i think he invented them himself. is there.. Read More
Little Greek
ever since my sweet baby athenos closed down, i’ve been hurting for some real ultimate gyros. sure, salem’s will do in a pinch, and acropolis does just fine (if you’re a fucking snob), but i want my middle of the road, delicious time gyros! GOD ATHENOS, WHY HAST THOU FORSAKEN ME??! enter: little greek. i’m gonna just write it straight up – i’ve found my athenos replacement. really. that easy… Read More
Taco Bell’s Doritos Locos Tacos
i must say, it’s been far too long since my last taco bell review. what a sad state of affairs!! i basically live at taco bell, sucking what little nutrients i can find from their many massive meat tubes behind the counter. the only problem being the inevitable dehydration from the constant diarrhea. ah well, such is life. such is love. today, we explore taco bell’s most neckbeardy creation to.. Read More
Burger King’s NEW French Fries
okay. so i went a little crazy for thanksgiving. what began as a challenge to myself to see how much i could eat in one day concluded itself in a symphony of physical anguish and mental collapse. i awoke at the crack of dawn on got straight to work, soloing my way through a tray of stuffing, half a casserole dish of green bean casserole, seven pounds of mashed potatoes,.. Read More
Burger King’s Deluxe Cheeseburger
why it’s my old friend burger king! how are you old friend? any new burgers lately? what’s that? you’ve STOLEN THE BIG MAC??? oh, burger king! wellllllllll it looks like burger king is up to its old tricks again! after the king himself snuck into mcdonald’s headquarters, stole their secret recipe for egg mcmuffins, and then made a commercial about it, now it looks like he’s gone after mcdonald’s crown.. Read More