wendy’s has never had great fries. mediocre, i’d say. average at best. they are french fries, they get the job done, they’re just nothing special. but i mean, for a huge fast food chain like wendy’s, you’d expect some effort to be put into everything, especially something that comes with every meal. not so with wendy’s, until now.

INTRODUCING THE NEW NATURAL CUT WENDY FRIES!

wendy's NEW fries

here they are! after all these years of waiting! finally! a french fry you can enjoy! …or can you?

i did. at least for the first few fries i did. the taste was pretty similar, but you got that rugged potato-skinny texture and flavor thrown into the mix. and the salt… well yes that was different too. in addition to being “uncircumcised”, they use sea salt. SEA SALT! from the sea! like that time you accidentally swallowed a whole bunch of sea water and vomited! yeah that stuff.

really, sea salt (as far as i can tell) is just a fashionable version of “salt”. but maybe it’s more salty per crystal? or maybe they just used way too much salt, because after about ten of the fries, i was getting salted out. it was too much! and that’s when i started to realize that the fries really tasted almost exactly the same as the old ones, fried exactly the same way. except they salted the shit out of them. i started freaking out! why would they do this? what happened to those old wendy’s fries i used to love?? my childhood!!!!

no, i never really cared for wendy’s fries before, and i certainly don’t now. they were way too salty. i guess it’s possible that my fries were just over salted on this one visit, but still… other that the saltiness, they tasted about the same. i appreciate the effort, but it wasn’t enough for me. it’s back to buying straight off the 99ยข menu for me.

thanks for trying, wendy. i still love you.